Now read your list of “I can’t” communication behaviors aloud and consider each one carefully. Go back and read each behavior aloud again, but this time, substitute the word “won’t” for “can’t.” (“I won’t ask my friends for favors when I need their help.”)
Be honest with yourself – were there behaviors on your list for which the word “won’t” seemed more accurate than the word “can’t?” Probably so, because there are very few communication behaviors which people are physically unable to do. “Won’t” suggests that an element of choice is involved.
Make a list of any statements that you revised to say, “I won’t,” and describe for each why it is more accurate than the original “I can’t” statements. Eliminate any “I won’t” statements from consideration for this project.