Revise Essay 2 in part based on my feedback but mostly based on your own abilities to apply revision strategies conveyed in our textbook and pursued all semester long in our reading and writing activities (page 139 and beyond are a good place to start) and assigned again for you to study prior to completing this activity. This activity has the potential to offer you experience using important writing skills that will benefit you in all other writing situations. “Skim” pages 1 through 173. You’ve read them before, but you’ll be amazed at how clear they seem now, at how helpful.

Earning an A or B or C grade on your original Essay 2 doesn’t mean that the essay cannot be greatly improved. The revisions may be less substantial at first glance, but the difference between a single word choice, just one word, can be the difference between lightening and a lightening bug. Go for the lightening. (And I stole that line from Mark Twain.)

Reconsider your introduction strategy, refine your thesis, improve your body paragraphs’ unity, coherence, and development, finish the essay with a more effective closing section. Focus attention on improving your appeal to readers’ “pathos” (and logos). Boost your ethos by using more impressive sources, more current, and by using more templates to integrate them effectively and with variety. See Canvas, Modules, Course Resources handout on ethos, logos, and pathos for help. I gave some of you something of a pass meeting the smaller, specific requirements (colon, semicolon, dash, ellipses, etc), but I won’t this time. Use the DIY university and learn.

Confirm you are employing one of the Introduction strategies we’ve studied this semester (Use the handout at Canvas, Modules, Course Resources)

Add at least one effective analogy. (See the handout on Analogies at Course Resources.)

Add at least one new and effective research resource.

If you don’t already have two images, add one.

Eliminate every sentence level error, every typo.

Increase the overall word length by 300. Add a new section, a new counter-argument, add more development, improve your intro by including an example, a story, and anecdote, and if you are still struggling, as me for help.