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The student’s strategy of drawing interest in the introduction

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The student’s strategy of drawing interest in the introduction

Is it effective? Why or why not?

The student uses a story to draw interest in this piece. The use of narrative to draw attention relies on human nature to eagerly respond to it. A story that is told well is the most captivating form of entertainment. The student draws the reader in from the beginning, which summarizes the effect of this strategy. “It’s 9:00 am, the bell has rung, and a sea of children head into the school.” This technic enables the student to introduce characters which, in this case, are learners who are the center of the schooling debate. This strategy is very effective as it grabs the attention of the reader instantly, and because it is done well and a good transition employed after the story, its effect as an irresistible hook for the rest of the paper remains.

Where/how does the student use limited refutation strategy?

The student uses limiting refutation strategy when they immediately negate the arguments against homeschooling. The student mainly uses refutation through evidence; for instance, “Homeschooling took a downturn in popularity for a while; however, over the last 20 years, homeschooling has increased by the double-digit percentage.” At this point, the student does not, however, provide a clear basis and justifications, which renders it invalid. This is, however, canceled out by the numerous evidence the student, later on, provides with bases and justifications.

Has the student used a strong advanced thesis?

What is the overall argument, and what are the subtopics?

The student has a thesis at the end of the introduction, which draws its strength from indicating the paper’s point without using obvious structures such, “The point of this paper….” The thesis used is also very clear and specific and does not include vague statements or words. The thesis is not general and focuses on what the student seeks and manages to accomplish in the few pages.

The student argues that homeschooling is a successful alternative to traditional schooling. Three crucial subtopics are used in this paper, which includes homeschooling allows children to socialize through positive experiences, allows for a child’s education to be customized, and results in the child reaching a higher level of education.

Are the body paragraphs correctly structured?

Does each body paragraph have a clear topic sentence? Why or why not?

The student appears to use outlining to arrange ideas in the form of the main subtopics. However, the content within these subtopics indicates that the student may have started freely or by freewriting, which is an excellent technique to clear the congestion of thoughts. The ideas within the outline might be a bit scattered, which provokes this thought. The student then uses outlining to manage the subtopics or the ideas and arrange them in a manner that is organized.

Does each topic sentence have a direct connection to the thesis? Explain

The student has done so well with topic sentences as they clearly introduce what the paragraph will be about. For all three paragraphs each with a different subtopic, the author creates a topic sentence that creates a basis for the rest of the section.

Each topic sentence has a controlling idea that directly connects to the thesis. The student in the thesis mentions the why? By mentioning three topics that support the argument of why homeschooling is a successful alternative to traditional schooling. “Homeschooling provides parents and children a successful alternative to traditional schooling as it allows for customization in each child’s education, socialization through positive experiences and continuation to higher education.” To continue this illustration, the topic sentence for the second idea goes like ” unlike traditional schooling, which is very structured, homeschooling allows for a tailored education program.”

Are there transitions where needed? Are they effective? Why or why not?

The author does not require transitions per se between the paragraphs as the topics discussed are completely independent. However, the student uses a transition in one instance between the second and the third paragraph. Although the reader is reminded of what the student was discussing before, there is no actual need for the transition. The topic and paragraphs would do just fine as independents. The contents of these paragraphs do not logically lead to the next, and the relationship between the two paragraphs is forced. The transition does summarize the content of the paragraph but does not include anything about the one that follows.

Is research introduced early? Explain

The student definitely introduces the evidence very early. After the introductory sentence in the paragraph, the student counts the works of authors on the same topic. However, since the flow of the paper continues well, these researchers are effective and establish the stand of the student with justification.

Do the body paragraphs display a logical connection between research? Explain

The student does cite a lot of work from different authors. They use particularly the work of one Ray B. whose work appears to be a review based on the fact that he has cited numerous authors in his work. The student then uses Ray B. to generate the opinions of other authors. The student has already created a sound academic argument that allows them to achieve a logical connection, which entails connecting each researched point to argue an idea.

Do the body paragraphs have properly devised concluding statements? Explain

The student has concluding statements that “wraps up” each paragraph. These conclusions serve their purpose by demonstrating that the student did what they intended to do with the paragraph in question. The reader is afforded closure after each subtopic and proves the argument in that paragraph. For example, in the second paragraph, the student writes, “Each child has the whole world as their classroom and parents can utilize its many resources to customize their child’s education.” This is in reference to the idea that homeschooling enables customized education. Looking at the concluding statements for each paragraph, one can clearly notice that the introductory sentence guided it.

Is the essay cited properly according to APA

Are in-text citations used correctly? Provide examples

Is the reference page formatted correctly? Provide examples.

The student does well to cite something that has already been cited with intexts that include the names of the authors of the original and secondary sources. An example is (Harris, 1988, as cited in Ray, 2002). On the references page, the author provides the details of the secondary source, which among others, is the details for the journal by Ray 2002. Also, the references provided follow the APA referencing perfectly with the inclusion of Author surnames followed by first initials, the year the article was published, the title of the article, the name of the journal typed in italics, issue number enclosed in brackets and the page range. There is no DOI in any of these references, although this is an optional annotation. Example: Ray, B (2001). The Modern Homeschooling Movement. Catholic Education: A journal of inquiry and practice, (4)3, 405-421.

What is the student’s strategy in the conclusion

The conclusion provides a brief summary of the thesis and continues to suggest what the student has accomplished with this paper. The student understands what a conclusion is all about as new ideas are not introduced. Rather they manage to maintain interest by avoiding redundancy by merely restating the thesis. Instead, the argument is restated in a fresh manner and with a more in-depth understanding. The student includes making every moment a learning moment for a child as the only major key point. The other points the reader has already been familiarized with in the course of the paper. Finally, the student concludes by writing, “Just as traditional schooling is successful for some, homeschooling is equally successful for others.” The student would not have had a better conclusion as this one effectively sums up the essay.

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